Winter is coming. Okay, by now you know the drill. I’m rewatching Game of Thrones from the start to prepare myself for the final season. Normally I try to get a little in depth with my rewatch posts, but it’s going to be a quick one today. I horrifically mismanaged my time today and am scrambling to get myself ready to go back to work tomorrow.
So, without further ado, the spoiler warning because this is a discussion of Season 3 and will very obviously have spoilers.
Okay, let’s start with the Lannisters: Jamie gets his hand cut off and thus begins his redemption arc. Cersei continues to be amazingly bitchy and threatens to strangle Margery. Tywin proves to be a bigger asshole than he has in the past, but he puts Joffrey in his place a few times and it is beautiful to behold. Tyrion marries Sansa and continues to be the only Lannister that I don’t want to murder.
Stannis ran back home and is sulking about his defeat. He throws Davos into the dungeons because he tries to kill Melisandre. Hi, I’m team Davos. Anyways, we also meet Stannis daughter Shireen and her character development definitely lead to future heart break. Melisandre half bones Gendry (more on how he get there later) and throws some leeches into a fire ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Mormont is murdered by the worst member of the Night’s Watch, but also Craster dies and that’s good. Sam kills a white walker with his obsidion blade and gets a baby named after him. Jon climbs the wall with the wildlings, gets laid, gets his face scratched up by a hawk, and then get shot 3 times with arrows by Ygritte.
As much as I don’t care for the white savior thing, Daenerys is pretty damn bad ass this season. She gets an army of unsullied, takes down the slave city of Astapor, and gets a cool dragon fire scene. Then she moves on to Yunki where she gets a hot dude to help her take the city and then she gets to crowd surf.
Theon has a no good, very bad season. He spends his whole time getting tortured by Ramsey Snow (Bolton). It’s awful and as much as I hate Theon, I feel bad for him. Ramsey is a grade A psychopath.
Now, the Starks. Buckle up, because this is gonna hurt. Sansa gets her hopes raised and broken too much this season. Bran and Rickon split up and Bran starts his journey to the three eyed raven. Arya gets picked up by the Brotherhood without Banners along with Gendry, who decides to stay with them. Gendry then gets sold off to Melisandre because the Brotherhood is garbage. Arya then runs off and gets to start her road trip with The Hound. They make their way to the Twins where Catelyn and Robb are for Edmure Tully’s wedding to a Frey girl to mend the rift caused by Robb marrying Talisa.
And this is where it all goes wrong. The Red Wedding. Even knowing it was coming, I was not prepared for how horrific this scene is. The Rains of Castamere starts to play and Catelyn knows something bad is about to happen. The moment on of the Freys stabs Talisa in the stomach I physically recoiled. There is nothing to prepare you for this scene, whether or not if you’ve seen it before. It is visceral and horrible, but so well executed.
- Tormund gets introduced this season but he is an asshole right now so I’m not caring too much.
- Also, we get the introduction of Olenna Tyrell and hot damn she is the best character ever.
- “The cheese will be served when I want it served and I want it served now.” OLENNA IS MY QUEEN.
- “The subtleties of politics are lost on me.” Margery Tyrell learned from the best.
- Edmure is the worst and the Blackfish is the best.
- Hot Pie giving Arya a bread wolf and saying goodbye gave me way more feels than I anticipated.
- Bronn calling Littlefinger “Lord twat beard” is one of my favorite Bronn moments.
- Ah, yes, we find out that Pod apparently is very good in bed. The callbacks to this throughout the season are hilarious.
- Varys is one scary dude when you think about it.
- Gendry telling Arya he is staying with the brotherhood hurts me. God, I hope these kids meet back up and DON’T DIE.
- Olenna and Tywin’s scene together is perfection.
- Jamie telling the story of his murder of the Mad King is some of the best acting from that actor.
- The following scene is another example of Olenna awesomeness:
Lady Olenna Tyrell: [to Loras] So, their son will be your nephew after you’re wed to Cersei, of course. And you will be the king’s stepfather and brother-in-law.
[Loras looks annoyed and upset. He does not respond]
Lady Olenna Tyrell: [to Margaery] When you marry the king, Joffrey’s mother will become his sister-in-law. And your son will be Loras’… nephew? Grandson? I’m not sure. But your brother will become your father-in-law, that much is beyond dispute.
- Every word that comes out of Lord Frey’s mouth makes me want to vomit.
- Robb making a joke about making a terrible mistake in marrying Talisa is NOT OKAY.
- The way Robb’s direwolf was killed is so sad. Especially considering Arya witnessed it.
- Tyrion has a list. I love it.
- Davos saving Gendry is my favorite thing. And thus a hundred memes about rowing are born.
- Jamie going back for Brienne
- Podrick bringing back Tyrion’s money from the brothel.
Most Painful or Cringeworthy moments:
- RED WEDDING
Character I’d Bring Back: Robb Stark and his direwolf
Character I’d Murder: Roose Bolton
Who I have an inappropriate crush on: Podrick. Though…it’s not inappropriate. Am I finally not being a trash person in my GoT crushes? HOW LONG WILL THIS LAST?
Who I want on the Iron Throne as of Right now: Olenna “I want my cheese now” Tyrell
FYI: I cannot wait for Season 4 because it brings me great joy in episode 2.